jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Rampage on Wed Dec 05, 2007 1:52 am

His n hers diary page. wednesday 21st november 2007.

Her: he was quiet, subdued, just not himself something was wrong. he didnt kiss me all night, didnt even look at me, i think its another woman. i went to bed n cried. he came up later and cuddled up to him and stroked his hair. eventually we made love and fell asleep in eachothers arms.



HIS. england lost, fuckin gutted. got a shag though!!

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Rampage on Wed Dec 05, 2007 1:55 am

in a recent survey by the government, UK residents were asked weather polish immigrants were a problem 23% said "its becomming a serious problem." 77% said "to nie jest powazna kwestia przytcalym!"

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Leon on Wed Dec 05, 2007 2:58 am

Rofl lol!!! lol!
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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by EvilEd on Wed Dec 05, 2007 5:41 am

Two niggers walking down the street see a sign that says, "Turn White for $15." The two junglebunnies turn their pockets inside out only to discover that one has a 20 dollar bill and the other one has a 10 dollar bill. Since neither one of them has exactly $15, they can't figure out how they can both get turned White.....Finally one of them has a stroke of genius. "You take $20 and go in there and get turned White, then when you come out you can give me your $5 change and then I will have $15 and I can get turned white, too!" "Bet, dog," says the other bootlip, and he goes inside. 10 minutes later, you wouldn't believe it. That nigger was blond haired, blue eyed, and even had on a suit and a tie. The first nigger says, "Man, holy shit, I can't believe it, you are really White! Hurry up and give me that $5 so I can do it too!" to which he replies...

"Fuck you, nigger, get a job!"

Q: What do you call 10 niggers in a steam room?

A: gorillas in the mist. What a Face

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Rampage on Wed Dec 05, 2007 2:35 pm

LOL im liking that 1st one.

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Puaj on Wed Dec 05, 2007 2:40 pm

Hahahahahah!! OMG! Good ones ED! lol!

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by jokiman on Fri Dec 07, 2007 10:19 pm

young william was bored one day and went up to his mum and said, mum pls show me a magic trick ,mum says i aint got time cant u see im making dinner go ask ur father, so he goes into the livingroom where his dad is watching the footy and asks dad can u show me a magic trick, dad says cant u see im watching footy go next door and ask ur garndfather to show u one . so young williams does and asks his grandfather to show him a magic trick. pop says ok bend over and i will put a finger in ur bum,williams does so and feel someting enter his rearend then pop puts both hands in front of williams face and says MAGIC..
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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by teskull on Fri Dec 07, 2007 10:46 pm

LOL
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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Rampage on Sat Dec 08, 2007 1:07 am

oh my god thats just worng man, WRONG!!!!!

which is what we like here lol.

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Puaj on Sat Dec 08, 2007 2:00 pm

Hahahaha

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Leon on Sat Dec 08, 2007 4:00 pm

lol joki that is just sick man, funny tho lol!
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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by ramadon-pap on Sun Dec 09, 2007 1:37 pm



just something small

bounce
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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Rampage on Sun Dec 09, 2007 2:53 pm

a guys sitting at a bar when a skinhead comes in and kicks him in the head. "thats karate from japan!" he says. few days later the skin head comes back and hits the same guy in the face saying "thats kung fu from china!! the little guy gets fed up and leaves the bar. he comes back and hour later and smacks the skin head across the face and says to the barman "tell that cunt when he wakes up that was a fucking spade from homebase!"

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by misterwilton on Tue Dec 11, 2007 12:23 am

8 or 9 posts later i am still laughing at the BURNS EVERYTHING ELSE gag
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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Puaj on Wed Dec 12, 2007 9:19 pm

An old lady comes to the Bank with a bag full of Money and says i want to make a deposit. The cashier looked at the bag full of Money and say: ok, but thats a lot of Money so u will need to se the president.
Ok says the old lady.
The president comes and ask the old lady Where did she get all that cash? The old lady told him that she makes a lot of BETS. What kind of BETS , asked the president.. for example I can bet u 25.000 dollars that U have square balls, the lady says.. The president star laughing and says .. COME ON thats at stupid bet, My balls are not square!! So the lady goes, then accept it. I do, says the president. OK she said, but do u mind if we meet here tomorrow at 10.00 am, i will bring my lawyer to make sure everything goes fine. No problem says de president.
The president couldn't sleep that night, he was staring at his balls thinking they are definitely NOT SQUARE..im gonna win 25.000!!
So the next day, at 10 am they meet again. The old lady ask the president to drop his pants to verify his balls. The president does it. The old lady say do u mind if I touch your balls.. u know its a lot of Money and i have to be sure they are not square! Of course says the president, go ahead. So the old lady start touching his balls.. meanwhile the president noticed that the lady lawyer was hitting his head against the wall repeatedly.. so he ask whats is wrong with your lawyer..?? The old lady says.. nothing it just that I betted him 100.000 DOLLARS that TODAY AT 10.00 AM I WILL HAVE THE BANK PRESIDENTS BALLS IN MY HANDS.. cheers


Last edited by on Thu Dec 13, 2007 3:18 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by teskull on Wed Dec 12, 2007 11:06 pm

dude i gotta try that one
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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Rampage on Fri Dec 14, 2007 2:21 pm

blonde girl is wanting new a new beauty treatment to try after her others dont work. she reads that if you bathe in milk it will give you better looks. she runs round to see the milkman and "i need enough milk tohave a bath in" says the blonde. "pasturized?" replies the milk man. the blonde pauses for a min and then says "no just up to my tits should be enough".



following the uproar of calling a teddy mohammed in sudan, sooty has now cancelled his tour of jamaca.




a tranee undertaker is preparing a recently passed female for the funeral. after washing her he sees a problem and tells his boss "this lady has a prawn in her vagina". "what? let me see" says the boss who takes a look. !thats her clitorus you stupid twat!!" he says "oh" says the trainee "it tasted like prawns to me"


man takes his sex doll back to the market and says "i payed forty quid for this shitty thing and it went down on me last night!" market trader looks at him and says "BLOW UP SEX DOLLS NOW 80 QUID!"


as christmas is appraching fast i want to remind all TE666 members that doggie is not just for christmas, its a great position for all year round!




i met a blind paki at the ATm today, he asked me to check his balance for him, so i pushed him over.



i asked santa for a jacket this year and i got 3. i asked him for a pound for the bus. i got 10. i asked santa for a little help around the house, i got a black bastard at the door.



merry FUCKING xmas YOU BASTARDS and have a SHIT FACED new year TWAT.

sincerely the tourettes society lol! CUNT!!!

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Rampage on Tue Dec 18, 2007 9:30 am

a female journolist went out into iraq in 1991 to investigate why arab women walk 10 feet behind the men. in 2004 she returned to find that the men now walk 15 feet behind the women. excited by this she asks a young lady why this change has happened, the girl replies "its because of landmines".



whats the difference between a penis and a bonus?

your wife will always blow your bonus!


a drunk man is wandering round a car park shouting "oh my god they stole my car!" a police walks up to him and asks whats wrong, "someone stole my car it was on the end of my keys earlier on" the police man says "ok but do you know your dicks hanging out of your pants?" the drunk looks down and shouts "the bastards took my fucking girlfriend too!!"

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Rampage on Fri Dec 21, 2007 2:41 am

christmas time, valium and wine, children indulging in serious crime. dads doing weed and mums high on crack, christmas is great when your family is black!

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Leon on Fri Dec 21, 2007 4:37 am

ROFL!!! lol ramp
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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Puaj on Fri Dec 21, 2007 2:50 pm

HAHAHAHAH!!

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by pvtparts on Sun Dec 23, 2007 4:30 pm

nice ramage!
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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Rampage on Mon Dec 24, 2007 1:23 am

a jewish woman says to her mum "im going to divorce my husband, he only wants anal sex and now my arsehole is the size of 50p, it used to be the size of 5p." her mum replies "darling you have a big house, a porsche a grand per week allowance and 6 holidays a year and your going to throw it all away for 45p?"

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by Leon on Mon Dec 24, 2007 6:15 am

LOL!!!
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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

Post by teskull on Sat Dec 29, 2007 9:54 pm

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Re: jokes! get em all in here! (may be offensive to all)

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